Artist Statement

My present work is based on the 1980s Ridly Scott film Blade runner. It is a link with my past when I was a teenager when I got indoctrinated and emotionally abused by older adults who were Anarchists. I was so traumatized by it, I withdrew from society and sought solitude in the woods near me until my mid-twenties. I have gone into more detail of the experience and the affect it has had on my work in my contextual statement. I watched the film Blade Runner at the time I was living a hermit-like existence in the woods. It had a powerful effect on me because I could strongly relate to the film's characters struggles and their need for answers. It is a long time since I have seen the film but whenever I see images or hear music from the Vangelis soundtrack, it transports me back to that part of my life. Due to the powerful effect, the film has on me, I use music and sounds from the film as a catalyst to use for my final level 6 project. I have used the strong emotions that it arouses in me to push the work forward. 

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My way of working for this project and other works is to reject my first immediate perception to a person or object and instead build on physic structures, impressions and mental images that pass through me. I am working to try to create the clear essence of the subject matter that I am trying to depict. I often distort and work quickly to try and achieve this aim. 

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I started the project using oil paint because it was a medium that was quite unfamiliar to me but because of this unfamiliarity, my paintings were looking too labored as a result. I switched to watercolor and pastels that I was more familiar with. This allowed me to forget about learning technique and concentrate on working in a more expressionistic way. My aim was to evoke moods and ideas for the viewer through mark-making rather than them admiring the capturing of a good physical likeness. I tried to react instinctively and expressively to the Blade Rider subject matter and at times seemed to be doing the paintings automatically as the doors from the past were opened. I used the memories of joy and sadness from that part of my past and thinking back to that time influenced my work. 

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As an artist, I also work hard to develop my paintings in an expressive way to paint the beauty that is before me. I think my way of working is very similar to expressionism as I employ swirling swaying and exaggerated brushwork to depict my response to what i am viewing and trying to depict. Due to spending a lot of time in nature and away from big cities in my formative years, when I eventually got back to living into normal society and city living it was in some ways an anti-climax because of the dehumanizing effect of mass-industrialization. So like the expressionist artists my work can express the frustrations, anxiety in my response to the banality and contradictions that I discern in modern life. In a way, I feel my work is always looking to capture the beauty that lies within everything that is part of nature’s cycle.